Ross: 'My BBC Suspension Fun'

Jonathan Ross has told of the "fun" he is having during his suspension from his £6m-a-year job at the BBC.
The TV star was given a "final warning" by the state broadcaster over the obscene phone calls scandal, which saw him lose £1.4m in pay when he was suspended for 12 weeks.
But the 48-year-old is clearly taking it all in his stride, revealing in his blog how he is filling his days by munching chips and pasta, watching films, and smoking expensive Cuban cigars.
Updating his fans on the website Twitter, he wrote: "Smoking a Cohiba and watching Sex And The City Season 6. Suspension is fun."
In another entry, he says: "I am going out with my wife for dinner and someone else is paying. I now wish I hadn't eaten so much earlier.
"Eating pasta while the dogs try to use their mind control on me. They want pasta bad."
On the blog, he describes himself as an "ageing roue and former chess champ" and says he is "currently resting".

Ross sparked outrage when he and comedian Russell Brand left lewd messages on Fawlty Towers actor Andrew Sachs' answer phone.
The BBC received thousands of complaints over the matter, and bosses have ordered Ross to tone down his swearing when he returns in the New Year.
Ross, who has more than 1,000 people following him on his blog including celebrities John Cleese and Stephen Fry, also wrote about how he was planning his comeback.
"Wondering what record I should play on first radio show. Maybe - You're Gonna Miss Me When I'm Gone by radio Birdman. Any thoughts?"

This week Ross had a "pre-production talk" with BBC chiefs about his return, which will no doubt be under a massive amount of scrutiny.
As well as the Sachs debacle, the BBC also condemned him for the offensive language he used towards actress Gwyneth Paltrow when he interviewed her last May.
Meanwhile, Brand, 33, who resigned over his involvement in the Sachs scandal, has landed on his feet by making his name in Hollywood, and winning a British Comedy Award.

What Badge Do You Get For That?

Three British scout leaders have told of their terror after they were attacked by a hippopotamus during a canoe trip in Africa.

Brian Sheen, 66, Geoff Ryder, 59, and Michael Billworth, 23, were four days into a trip down the Niger River in Guinea when the beast struck "like a submarine-launched missile".

They were forced to abandon their damaged canoe and trek through the jungle for five days to reach a small village where they received help.

Mr Sheen said he was amazed by the speed and ferocity of the attack.

He added: "The front went up and the middle went up. Then the back flew in the air and Geoff, who is 16 stone, was suddenly airborne and landed in the water beside the boat.

"It happened so quickly we didn't have time to be scared."

The three men, from Cornwall, had just started a 2,500-mile trip from Faranah along the Niger River to promote the scouting movement.

They managed to drag their sinking vessel on to a mud bank and salvaged what equipment they could carry before walking back to a village they had passed on the way.

The men, who have all returned to Cornwall, hope to revisit the area next year.

Jam, Jerusalem And Prostitutes

Tens of thousands of Women's Institute members are being urged by the Government to help crack down on sleazy sex adverts in local newspapers.

But campaigners have slammed the move and say it will only drive prostitutes on to the streets - making them ten times more likely to be attacked.

In a speech to the WI, Minister for Women Harriet Harman asked its 205,000 UK members to complain to editors if they see the adverts in local newspapers.

She said many of these sex workers are trafficked into this country and forced into prostitution.

However, representatives of the UK's estimated 80,000 prostitutes say Ms Harman is grossly exaggerating the problem in order to launch an anti-immigration message - and a moral crusade.
Niki Adams, of the English Collective Of Prostitutes, told Sky News Online: "It's appalling, it's absolutely terrible (what Harriet Harman is saying).

"It's ten times safer for women to work together in a house than on the street.

"And local newspapers are one of the few ways women have to advertise. This sort of thing will force them out on to the streets - is that what the WI wants?"

She added: "The Government has fabricated the trafficking figures to make it appear worse.

"They are putting together violence and prostitution. We know the difference between consensual sex and rape.

"We don't glamorise prostitution - it's not the job most of us wanted to get into - but it's better than some jobs."

She praised a recent report by Hampshire WI, which called for the decriminalisation of brothels in the wake of the Ipswich prostitute murders.

The group interviewed sex workers in New Zealand, America, and the Netherlands and passed a resolution "urging local authorities to provide safe working spaces for the operation of brothels".

But Pat Marshall, chairman of Hampshire WI, held back on criticising Ms Harman.

"We are waiting to see what Harriet Harman has to say and will think about that in the light of our resolution," she told Sky News Online.

But a spokeswoman for the national group said members would be encouraged to look out for adverts and write letters of complaint to editors if they found them.

The Government has unveiled a number of proposed new laws in its crackdown on the sex industry.

They include rape charges for men who pay for a prostitute who has been forcibly trafficked into the country, and the naming and shaming of kerb crawlers in local newspapers.

Staff Sacked Over Glitter Email

Social workers in Scotland have been sacked for circulating an email showing Gary Glitter carrying a child in a plastic bag.

A spokeswoman for South Lanarkshire Council told Sky News Online that a total of 15 staff have so far been fired or reprimanded.

She said investigations are continuing and more heads may roll over the "inappropriate" image.

Some of those disciplined are trained social workers - responsible for protecting vulnerable children. Others are from the council's roads department.

The image - which shows convicted paedophile Glitter carrying a bag with a child's head superimposed on it - was circulated on the office network.

An inquiry was launched after a disgusted worker alerted bosses at the council.

A council spokeswoman said: "As of today a number of employees across the council have been dismissed and others have received final written warnings over the circulation of the email.

"The image is one currently circulating throughout the United Kingdom.

"The image is totally inappropriate and represents a gross misuse of council email.

"A council investigation is continuing and we are working through the disciplinary process."

She said employees may appeal any decisions.

Most of those involved are based at the council's Rutherglen office, near Glasgow.

Glitter - whose real name is Paul Gadd - served almost three years in prison in Vietnam for sex crimes involving two young girls.

The shamed former rock star was deported from the country at the end of his prison term and flew to Thailand and Hong Kong.

Last week it emerged he is to launch a legal challenge to have his name removed from the sex offenders' register.

If successful, it will allow him greater freedom to travel abroad.

Virtual Divorce Cases To Soar

Britain's first virtual divorce is just the tip of the iceberg as more people seek sex and thrills in fantasy worlds, psychologists have warned.

Sky News Online's exclusive story revealed how Amy Taylor, 28, was divorcing husband David Pollard after she caught him cheating on her in virtual reality game Second Life.

She told how she found the 40-year-old at the computer - watching his 3D character having sex with a prostitute in the game.

Because the pair, from Newquay in Cornwall, spent so much time in the virtual world, she saw the online infidelity as every bit as real as if it had happened in real life.

She cited 'unreasonable behaviour' in her court papers, and her solicitor told her it was the third divorce case involving Second Life she was dealing with.

Our story was taken up by the world's media, as pundits wondered whether it had exposed a cyber society where morality is set aside for secret, adulterous desires.

And, according to experts we contacted, Amy and David's virtual reality divorce is just the start.
"I am sure this type of divorce is going to be an increasing phenomena, there's no doubt about it," psychologist Dr Aric Sigman told Sky News Online.

"It's going to be a huge problem, especially when you consider what will happen when the Facebook generation grows up, because all they are doing is interacting with an image on screen.

"It's what they are not doing in real life that leads to these divorces. Britain is the most time-poor country in Europe, so when people are spending the few hours they have in a virtual world, it's worrying."

Professor Mark Griffiths, an expert on internet addictions, also thinks there will be more cases as more people go online.

So far, more than 15 million people have created characters in Second Life, and membership of the game is growing by 70,000 a day, and shows no sign of slowing down.

Dr Griffiths, from Nottingham Trent University, says the problem lies in the fact that the internet is a non-threatening environment where deep relationships are easy to form.

He believes the instigators of virtual reality divorce cases are more likely to be female.

"Women are stereotypically far more upset of emotional infidelity," he said. "Men are less likely to react into a depth that women do. Physical infidelity is more likely to affect them."

But what does this hold for the legal profession as more people split up for events that 'happen' in fantasy worlds?

Divorce lawyer Andrew Newbury says the court system will not have to change because even though affairs in cyber space are legally not adultery - they do constitute unreasonable behaviour.

"People are cheating in different ways, it's a new phenomenon," he said. "It may be difficult to prove, but anything that happens on the internet is recorded.

"Even if you can't prove it, someone spending much of their time on the internet is potentially neglecting their relationship.

"And hence the divorce can be granted on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour."

Britain's First Virtual Divorce Case

A woman is divorcing her husband after she caught him cheating on her in a 3D virtual world.

Amy Taylor, 28, cited unreasonable behaviour in the court papers, describing how their three-year marriage came to an end when she twice walked in on her husband pretending to have sex in an online game.

Her estranged husband is now engaged to one of the women he had an 'affair' with on Second Life - even though they have never actually met in real life.

Amy told Sky News Online how she thought she had found the love of her life when she met David Pollard in an internet chatroom in May 2003.

They swapped photos online, and after six months of emails and phone calls, she moved from London into his seaside flat in Cornwall.

The couple spent hours having fun together in Second Life - her avatar, or alter ego, in the 3D virtual world was Laura Skye, and his Dave Barmy.

But her dreams were shattered three months later when she went for an afternoon nap and woke to find the jobless 40-year-old having sex with an escort girl in the game.

"I went mad - I was so hurt. I just couldn't believe what he'd done," Amy said.

"I looked at the computer screen and could see his character having sex with a female character. It's cheating as far as I'm concerned.

"But he didn't see it as a problem, and couldn't see why I was so upset. He said I was just making a big fuss, and tried to make out it was my fault for not giving him enough attention."

She added: "We then made it up and he promised he would never do anything to hurt me again, and would never cheat on me again."

The couple got hitched at a registry office in St Austell in July 2005 - and even marked the occasion by holding a virtual wedding in Second Life.

They moved to a flat in Newquay, and carried on their virtual lives in the online world, but Amy knew something was wrong.

"I still had my suspicions, but couldn't my finger on it," she said. "He never did anything in real life, but I had my suspicions about what he was doing in Second Life."

And then the bombshell came in April this year, when she found him in a compromising position with his avatar.

"I caught him cuddling a woman on a sofa in the game. It looked really affectionate," she said.

"He turned off the computer monitor, and I turned it back on and demanded to look at his chat history.

"But he turned off the computer so the history was all deleted - and I ended up going off to his Mum and Dad's in floods of tears."

She added: "He confessed he'd been talking to this woman player in America for one or two weeks, and said our marriage was over and he didn't love me anymore, and we should never have got married."

The next day Amy went to a solicitor to file for a divorce, which is due to be finalised next week.

"The solicitor wasn't at all surprised - she said it was her second divorce case involving Second Life that week," she added.

Amy says she was down in the dumps for a while - but now has a new man in her life, who she met while playing the internet fantasy role-playing game World Of Warcraft.

New Blow For Madeleine's Parents

Kate and Gerry McCann have admitted the Portuguese police files into their daughter’s disappearance hold fewer clues than they had hoped.

They were praying the thousands of documents from the huge dossier of evidence, released in August, would contain missed clues into Madeleine’s whereabouts.

But Gerry, 40, said: "We're not halfway through but there is less information than we expected."

He also said he and Kate have expanded the support team to find the little girl, who was three when she vanished in Praia da Luz, Portugal, on May 3 2007.

The files assembled by detectives over more than 14 months include forensic reports, witness statements, police intelligence and details of hundreds of possible sightings of Madeleine reported around the world.

Also in the file is the final 58-page report written by the Portuguese public prosecutors, who ruled on July 21 that the case should be shelved.

When the eagerly-awaited dossier was handed over in the summer, Mr McCann said his family "strongly believed" Madeleine could still be found and made a fresh appeal for information from the public.

However, Gerry said it was getting harder to find the clues to unlock a “painful situation” as the days go on without her.

But the McCann family spokesman Clarence Mitchell said there was still hope. “The files do show what the police did not do, which can suggest new avenues,” he added.

Gerry also revealed the pain the family felt as they reached the 18-month milestone of their daughter's disappearance.

He said: "This week was unusual in that both Kate and I were feeling low at the same time, which is an uncommon occurrence, and we can usually rely on one of us lifting the other.”

He added: "Monday 3rd of November was 18 months since Madeleine was so cruelly taken from us.

"We do not usually put a lot of store in specific milestones - these being just another day without Madeleine.

"We continue to work very hard behind the scenes. Our support team has been expanded as we try to identify what has been done, what has not been done and what can still be done to help find Madeleine.

"As I have stated many times, someone has a key bit of information that can unlock this frustratingly difficult and painful situation."

Official Axed After 'Human Flesh Search'

A Chinese official accused of attacking an 11-year-old girl in a restaurant has been tracked down and fired following a so-called internet 'human flesh search'.

Web surfers sprung into action after the girl's ordeal was posted online with images taken from a security video at the venue in the Chinese city of Shenzhen.

The footage apparently shows the youngster running back to her family, and then a confrontation with a middle-aged man in the restaurant.

She was reportedly followed into the toilet. The man grabbed her around the neck, but she managed to break free.

Her father is seen confronting the attacker, who reacts angrily and tries to buy off the family, according to the clip on YouTube.

"Yes I did it, so what? How much do you want, just tell me. I'll give you the money," the man said.

"Do you know who I am? I am from the Ministry of Transport. I rank with the mayor of your city. So what if I grabbed the neck of a small child? You people count for ****!"

The video sparked outrage in China, where corruption among officials is rife.

And the man was soon tracked down from the grainy images and named and shamed as Lin Jiaxiang, of the Shenzhen maritime bureau.

Lin has now been sacked from his job, the Ministry of Transport party committee confirmed.

It said his "wild words and behaviour have had an extremely negative impact on society".

China's internet users have become skilled at tracking down individuals featured on websites.

A woman photographed killing a kitten with a stiletto heel was later identified as a nurse in the country.

Personal details of her love life were posted online by furious animal-lovers.

Pensioner Puts Heat On Ramsay

An 81-year-old amateur cook who specialises in microwave ready meals is putting the heat on Gordon Ramsay.

Peter Oakley's gastronomic skills may be distinctly lacking compared to those of the three-star Michelin chef, but he has proved a bigger hit on the internet.

And the Derbyshire widower even has his own culinary tip for Britain's highest paid chef - cut down on the swearing.

Last week, Ramsay posted an advert on video-sharing website YouTube looking for recruits for his new Cookalong show on Channel 4.

The next day, Oakley served up his own version, which initially attracted two times more viewers than Ramsay's.

The apron-clad OAP is seen in the clip constantly swigging from a glass of wine as he prepares a "delightful chicken casserole" in his bungalow kitchen.

With the deftest of touches, he pops the frozen, ready meal in a microwave, and stresses: "It's most important you time it right because soggy vegetables are the pits."

Oakley has become a web sensation under the user name 'Geriatric1927' (the year of his birth) after posting scores of clips on YouTube.

He told Sky News Online: "It was all a bit of fun really. I just live on my own, and I can't be bothered to cook fussy recipes. I certainly wasn't meaning to be mean.

"I just thought it'd be interesting to show how the geriatrics do it, with little thought for hygiene and everything, but If Ramsay was to invite me round and cook me one of his meals I know I'd enjoy it."

But there is one thing he believes the irascible chef could learn from him - and that is to stop turning the air blue all the time when he is cooking on TV.

"As an old person I personally don't like swearing, and don't see why there should be so much of it on TV, especially after the fuss about about Ross and Brand," he said.

"But I suppose it's just Ramsay's way. He's a very brilliant businessman, and a brilliant performer. But I suspect in real life, he doesn't swear all the time like that."

Oakley said his "cookalong the geriatric way" clip came about when he was invited to the head offices of YouTube's parent company, Google - and met the Queen.

He said: "A woman from Ramsay's cookalong programme was there, and she asked me if I would do my own version, so I did it and sent it off."

The simplicity of his meals has clearly struck a chord with internet users - and now the pensioner plans to film a guide to choosing and cooking meat at his local butcher's shop.

One viewer, who logged on as atomrose, said: "This is my kind of cooking...none of this Ramsay and Oliver rubbish. All I've got to do is learn to count - is that seven minutes in metric or imperial?"

Man Saves Dog By Fighting Shark

A US man has told how he saved his dog from the jaws of a shark - by punching the creature until it let go.

Greg LeNoir and his rat terrier Jake were enjoying their daily swim at a Florida Keys marina when the attack happened.

A 5ft-long shark surfaced and sunk its teeth into the dog, almost swallowing it in the process.

The carpenter sprung into action, diving headfirst into the water and punching the beast until it finally let go of Jake.

The dog bobbed to the surface, and the pair swam back to the quayside, leaving a trail of blood behind them. The two-year-old rescue dog suffered puncture wounds and lacerations during his ordeal, but is now on the mend.

Mr LeNoir said: "I saw a big, dark green shape, which I realised was a big shark's head. It zoomed up from under Jake.

"Jake screamed - a death scream - and it sucked him under. I dove (sic) straight down like a battering ram, and I drove my fist under the water into the shark. And it pushed him down - it felt like concrete on my hand."

The 53-year-old admits he was terrified when he saw the shark, but was not worried about his own safety. His only thought was saving his pet.

He added: "Jake is such a big part of mine and my wife's life - we don't have children. This is what she considers the closest thing to a child. And I couldn't abandon him."

AK47 Youth Held Over Road Terror

A youth filmed terrifying motorists with an AK47 rifle has been arrested following an investigation by Sky News Online.

Friends of the yob filmed the disturbing video as he walks out into a quiet, country road in High Wycombe, Bucks, and points the replica firearm at oncoming cars.

The 55-second mobile phone footage was found on YouTube during a Sky investigation into videos featuring guns on the internet.

Thames Valley Police detectives were alerted and they then tracked down the offender and seized the replica AK47 rifle.

Officers said the man was arrested under new laws for possessing an imitation firearm in a public place, and released with a caution on the same day.

Police thanked Sky for helping track down the offender - and warned how easily gang members with replica guns could get themselves killed.

Supt Rob Angell, from High Wycombe police force, added: "Possession of an imitation fire arm in a public place is a criminal offence and we take incidents like this very seriously.

"Not only does this waste police time, the real worry is that a person playing with a replica gun in a public place could be confronted with an armed officer who thinks the weapon is real.

"In this situation, the worst case scenario is that that young person could be shot. And that's the last thing we want to happen."

Sky found the clip after YouTube introduced a ban in the UK on videos "showing weapons with the aim of intimidation" amid widespread unease about gang violence.

The footage begins with a gangly youth with a scarf pulled over his face walking down a garden path.

His friends egg him on as he walks out into the road with the rifle and points the weapon at an oncoming car.

Another gang member shouts out: "I kill you all - I kill you now!" as the terrified driver spots the rifle.

The youth points the gun at another car, which screeches to a halt. The gang then run from the scene, laughing.

Thames Valley Police has produced a film with local schools to raise awareness of the dangers of possessing real or fake firearms.

The video, called Worlds Collide, shows how youths with replica or BB guns could easily get themselves killed if confronted by armed police.

Was Madeleine Spotted In Majorca?

Detectives searching for Madeleine McCann are investigating a sighting of the little girl on a beach in Majorca.

A British couple claim they saw the youngster with two women at Cala d'Or, in the south east of the island.

They went to their hotel to check internet pictures of Madeleine and were certain it was her.

But when they returned to the beach there was no sign of the girl, who was three when she vanished in Portugal on May 3 last year.

Police on the island have launched a search of nearby hotels and holiday apartments.

Clarence Mitchell, family spokesman for the McCanns, thanked the couple for reporting the sighting.

He told Sky News Online that detectives employed by the Madeleine Fund are investigating.

He added: "Kate and Gerry are very grateful to the British couple concerned, however we can't go into any further detail until our investigators have checked out the report."

He stressed that the two doctors would not build up their hopes, because there had been many sightings of their daughter which had come to nothing.

Madeleine disappeared from a holiday apartment in Praia da Luz while her parents Kate and Gerry dined with friends in a nearby restaurant.

Police Terror Cash Boasts Slammed

A police sergeant has been criticised for sending emails to colleagues offering bumper overtime payments to pay for luxury holidays and wide-screen TVs.

Thames Valley Police's £5m overtime bonanza came thanks to Britain's biggest terror hunt when police searched woods near High Wycombe, Bucks.

Sergeant David Bald's emails to colleagues in Bletchley, Milton Keynes, and Wolverton offered "premium rates" of pay to those "with a raging credit card habit".

Volunteers were told that night shifts, believed to be paid at £300 a time, required "little effort, no paper-work and a restful time away from the stresses and strains of everyday life".

But police chiefs have taken a dim view of his boasts, and said they were in "poor taste".

A Thames Valley Police spokesman: "The emails that are referred to are unacceptable and do not reflect the attitude of police officers as a whole.

"They were misguided and written in poor taste and recalled as soon as senior officers became aware of them."

He told Sky News Online that Sgt Bald had not been punished for his actions, but had been "spoken to and given advice".

One message, called "108 shopping days to Christmas", sought officers for Saturday shifts and said the money "could buy the joy and admiration of your children on Christmas morning . . . is that not priceless?"

The internal e-mails sought volunteers to search King's Wood and Fennels Wood as part of Operation Overt into an alleged terrorist plot to blow up passenger planes.

The operation cost Thames Valley Police £8m, including £4.9m in overtime.After the end of the liquid bomb plot trial, it was revealed that police chiefs had resisted pressure from Thames Valley Police Authority to call off the searches, which it said were too expensive.

The spokesman confirmed: "Operation Overt necessitated Thames Valley Police providing hundreds of police officers to play a part in what was a hugely important investigation over a period of around six months.

"The Force deployed officers from their usual Thames Valley postings for 5184 working days, at an opportunity cost of £1.4m.

"This put a strain on the policing of local communities and therefore overtime, at a cost of £4.9m was used, as well as assistance from other forces (at a cost of £1.9m).

Just End It Like Beckham

The countdown to the 2012 Games has officially begun after London was handed the Olympic flag - and if Britain's cameo is anything to go by the omens don't look good.

David Beckham, Leona Lewis and Jimmy Page fronted the eight-minute centrepiece in Beijing to officially start the clock ticking on the 1,433 days until the torch arrives.

But it was Britain's turn to shine after Beijing's faultless delivery, and in characteristic style a blunder soon became apparent.

It was not gaffe-prone London mayor Boris Johnson who provided the slip-up.

He didn't manage to set fire to the flag or poke it in the eye of a young child.

He walked along the long red carpet with his Beijing counterpart without managing to trip up.

His shoelaces were tied, and he even looked neat and tidy. His normally tousled hair was combed, and he waved the Olympic flag confidently the required six times.

The national anthem was then sung by a choir, including the far more awkward second verse, and the Union Flag was raised without becoming stuck halfway.

But when the lights went out, and London's dreadful 2012 Games logo was illuminated, it was obvious something was going to happen.

A red double-decker bus, emblazoned with London-Beijing-London, then drove into the Bird's Nest stadium without managing to run out of diesel.

This kick-started a bizarre dance routine involving newspapers and umbrellas. The dancers then crowded around the bus and leapt back dramatically for some reason as a young girl got out.

She got off the bus without falling - the London bus driver had actually stopped first. And then she walked along a zebra crossing, helped by a lollipop lady.

All it needed was a drunk holding a pasty, or a Big Issue seller, and the idyllic London scene would have been complete.

Some sort of James Bond wizardry took place, and no the bus didn't turn into a submarine or a helicopter.

Instead, wonder of wonders, the top opened up as The X Factor winner Lewis and Page, wielding a Gibson guitar, rose up on to a stage.

Lewis started off with some warbling and then the pair got it into their heads to try to pull off a widely optimistic version of Led Zeppelin's A Whole Lotta Love.

This was the trouble. The performance spectacularly failed to live up to its promises, with major sound problems leaving a pale imitation of the riffy, high-octane classic.

At times the guitar was drowned out, and sounded like it was coming through a bedroom amp, and Lewis looked uncomfortable throughout.

It was cringeworthy and I was glad when it spluttered to a stop. Only Beckham saved the day when he emerged from the top of the bus to rapturous applause.

He waved for a bit and then kicked a football into the crowd without managing to injure his metatarsal.

Chinese dancers scrambled for the ball like relic hunters, and the cameras focused on the beaming face of the man who managed to hold on to it.

Bill Morris, London 2012's pompously-titled director of culture, ceremonies and education, had promised to keep things simple. And he did just that.

Why couldn't they all just end it like Beckham?

Beijing 2008: Olympics In Numbers

302 Number of gold medals won in Beijing. France took the last one by beating Iceland in the men's handball. Not the most spectacular of climaxes…

3 The number of 'slant-eyed' pictures that emerged of Spanish and Argentinean athletes making crude impersonations of Chinese people.

37 Age David Beckham will be when London hosts the 2012 Olympics. He hopes he is not too old to make a swansong appearance in the football.

132 Number of Olympic records broken in Beijing.

43 Number of world records broken.

87 Number of countries joining the medal count. First ever medals for Afghanistan, Mauritius, Tajikistan and Togo. First ever golds for Bahrain, Mongolia and Panama.

5 million Number of unique users on the IOC's official website - nearly double that of the 2004 Games.

8 Number of golds won by American swimmer Michael Phelps. He beat 78 countries in the medals table.

500,000 Number of enthusiastic Chinese volunteers welcoming Olympic visitors.

4 Number of drug cheats caught during the Games, including Ukrainian heptathlete Lyudmila Blonska, who was stripped of her silver.

437 Number of BBC staff covering the Games in Beijing.

15 million The cost in pounds of lottery funding per gold won by Britain.

40,000 The current bid in pounds for one of Lin Dan's trainers after he threw them into the crowd to celebrate his badminton gold.

67 The age of the oldest competitor in the Games. Hiroshi Hoketsu made a return to the dressage after a 44-year break.

9 The age of the Chinese girl who mimed during the opening ceremony because the real singer was not attractive enough.

1,100 The amount in pounds lost by British swimming ace Rebecca Adlington's parents in an internet ticket scam.

14 The alleged age of China's double gold-winning gymnast He Kexin. Beijing insists she is not underage, but the controversy continues.

1 The number of taxi bonnets a jubilant Bradley Wiggins rolled over at Beijing's London House, while shouting "peace to the world".

6 The shock factor when Britain's bronze medalist Bryony Shaw used the F-word live on TV.

20,000 The amount in pounds Britons will reportedly get if they win golds at the London Olympics, under new plans by the British Olympic Association (BOA).

100,000 The amount in pounds Phelps won for his eight titles.

20 The number of years in prison the offender should get who came up with the idea of calling Great Britain's stars Team GB.

Banned Dog Meat Served In Beijing

Restaurants in Beijing are continuing to serve dog meat despite an Olympic ban on the infamous dish.

Officials red-carded the food because they were worried about upsetting tourists visiting the capital during the Beijing Games.

But Sky News found five Beijing restaurants still serving the dish, and went along to visit one of them in the north-west of the city.

Da Cheng Jiu Jia, which in English means Big Honest Restaurant, specialises in dog meat, serving up everything from dog hot pot to fried dog's penis.

We bought a bowl of poodle, I mean noodle soup, with a generous handful of poached dog meat scattered over the top, for 60 yuan - £5 - and a plate of stir-fried dog in chilli sauce for £2.50.

The staff expressed little surprise that a foreigner was ordering the meat - despite the Olympic ban - and were more concerned about how incompetently I was handling my chopsticks.

The fried dog meat was revolting, and even though the fiery sauce managed to cover up most of the flavour, neither me nor my Chinese translator managed more than a mouthful.

But the poached dog meat was far worse. It is difficult to draw comparisons. The closest description I can muster is putrid pork, with a stringy texture similar to well-stewed beef.

I managed a mouthful of each, purely for research purposes, and was glad I'd ordered a plate of spinach and fried vegetables to help it down.

The owner showed no surprise when we left most of our meal - and in case you're wondering she didn't offer us a doggy bag.

She told my translator they did not know where the dog had come from, or what breed it was, but said it was bought from a wholesaler outside Beijing.

"We buy it in bags," she said." It is a mixture of different types of dog. Big ones and small ones."

Animal rights groups have slammed the dog meat trade in China, and said the Olympic ban was simply a cosmetic move to try to clean up the city's image for foreign visitors.

Earlier this year, Sky News told how investigation agency Ecostorm gained access to the industry by posing as businessmen and secured pictures of dogs being brutally killed with clubs and knives.

The images showed the animals taking up to seven minutes to die before they are boiled and skinned.

They said is was one of the worst examples of animal-abuse they have ever seen.During the 1988 Seoul Olympics, South Korea also banned dog from menus.

Olympic Knickers And A Twist

Olympic officials have been branded "pedantic" after a hockey coach was banned from a game because his players were wearing the wrong colour underpants.

Kevin Marr had to watch from the grandstand after New Zealand's male hockey players sported black pants under white shorts during an earlier game against China.

Under the rules, shorts and pants must match, but New Zealand had played in their alternate white strip against the home side, and the team did not have white underwear.

The arrow in the photo above shows the offending colour clash during the 2-2 draw against China.

Such was the transgression that Olympic bosses initially threatened to suspend the players involved – until Marr took the flak and said he was responsible for what they wore.

He was suspended instead and was banned from the team dugout for their 3-1 defeat to Germany.

"They're pretty pedantic rulings," Marr said. "They are trying to ensure teams present themselves in the best possible light.

"I understand where the rule comes from but to suspend players is wrong. I wore it on the chin. I could have appealed but it just uses a lot of negative energy you don't need."

But it is not the end of the fiasco – and German coach Jochen Heimpel may now find himself in hot water.

With New Zealand in their usual black, the Germans switched from their usual black shorts to red for the crunch match.

But red underpants were hard to come by, so they wore black, and were reported for flouting the Olympic sartorial rules.

Heimpel contacted Marr to say the clanger had been reported, and his players had initially been threatened with suspension from their semi-final.

All the sides were warned after the Kiwis were caught, so Marr thinks Heimpel is likely to be banned for two matches instead of one.

Champ Bolt Slated For Showboating

Superhuman sprinter Usain Bolt has been slammed by Olympic chiefs for excessive "showboating" on the eve of his bid for a third gold medal.

The Jamaican became the fastest man in the world when he claimed gold in the 100m and 200m in Beijing - and he could win a third gold in the 100m relay on Friday.

But he did not act in the "spirit of the Olympic ideal" during his two world record-breaking performances, International Olympic Committee president Jacques Rogge said.

Bolt, who was 22 on Thursday, celebrated his double with a shaky-leg dance, and mouthed "I'm Number One" to the crowd, who then sang Happy Birthday to him.

And in the 100m at the Olympics on Saturday, he slowed down to showboat his way over the line in 9.69 seconds.

But Mr Rogge said: "He is a young man but he should show more respect for his rivals. That would be more in the spirit of the Olympic ideal.

"He should shake hands with them after the finish line. However, he is only 21 and he will learn.

"I have no problems with his showboating (before the race) but a shake of the hand or a tap on the shoulder immediately after the race would be a good gesture."

He criticised the sprinter's slow down in the 100m race, and his chest-beating gesture that could be seen as mocking his opponents.

"I understand the joy," he said. "He might have interpreted that in another way, but the way it was perceived was 'catch me if you can.' You don't do that."

American sprinter Shawn Crawford said he saw nothing wrong in Bolt's showboating.

He said: "If this guy has worked his tail off, every day, on his knees throwing up like I was in practice, he deserves to dance."

Bolt stunned the crowd in the Bird's Nest stadium when he became the first man since Carl Lewis in 1984 to win the 100 and 200 golds at a single Olympics, and the only man ever to do it by breaking world records in both.

Olympic Hostesses Strip Naked

Olympic hostesses had to strip naked so their body proportions could be measured to ensure only the most perfect women represented China at the Games.

But so great was the honour to hand out medals at the Beijing Games that they all agreed to shed their Chinese silk dresses and bare all.This was just one of the meticulous demands for the women who would end up in the glare of the world's media.

The Beijing Organising Committee for the Games of the 29th Olympiad (BOCOG) also required the candidates' eyes to be exactly 30% down the length of their face.

Their faces needed to meet stringent standards, including the ratio between the "width of the nose and the length of the face" and "width of the mouth and width between the pupils".

The girls all had to be university-educated, aged 18 to 24, and between 5ft 5in and 5ft 8in, with a "ruddy and shiny complexion", "elastic skin" and "a plump but not fat body".

The judges examined 5,000 girls from Beijing and Shanghai colleges until a final 297 were selected to be "Olympic victory ceremony volunteers".

They were then sent on a rigorous "charm boot camp" in Beijing's northern Changping district.

Their training was intense, with lessons from 6.30am to 11pm, in body-shaping, dancing, manners, ceremony processes and basic Olympic knowledge.

They were made to stand for hours in high-heels, and learned to hone the perfect smiles by spending hours in front of a mirror with a chopstick between their teeth."

In the standing sessions, we had to stand still and smile for half an hour or more," said 20-year-old hostess Ma Sha.

"We also ran about 1,000 metres every day for physical conditioning."But all the girls believe the training and selection process was worth it and are proud to be representing their country at the podium.

"I've always dreamed of being a guide hostess for the table tennis athletes at the Olympic venue," said Yang Xu, 19.

"We have worked so much, simply to give for a few minutes a good impression at the Olympic victory ceremony as we want to show the most beautiful aspect of oriental ladies across the world," said another of the candidates, Li Ziye, with a perfect - if robotic - beaming smile.

Beijing: A Protest-Free Zone?

Chinese police have confirmed there have been no demonstrations in any of the three special Olympic protest zones - despite dozens of applications from activists.

A total of 149 people, including three from overseas, made 77 applications for permission to protest at the Beijing Olympics, but none were approved, and most requests were withdrawn or rejected.

A spokesman for the municipal public security bureau said most of the applications concerned labour, medical and welfare issues.

He said 74 of the applications had been withdrawn after amicable settlements between the parties and Chinese authorities.

"Two other applications have been suspended due to incomplete procedures," he added.
"In one case, the applicant wanted to involve children in the demonstration. This is against the law."

The other case concerned incomplete particulars, he said, but did not go into further details.

The zones were set up after international pressure to allow protests during the Olympics following the controversial decision to award the Games to Beijing.

The three areas - Zizhuyuan Park in the city's northwest, Ritan Park in the east, and World Park in the southwest - are all miles away from the Olympic area.

And anyone looking for peace and quiet would have done well to visit them.

When Sky News visited Ritan, or Temple of Heaven, kites were flying, children were fishing, and elderly people were playing cards.

But aside from the large numbers of police patrolling the park, there was nothing to suggest it was a designated protest zone.

There was nothing to show which part of the 20-hectare park had been set aside for public demonstrations, or how large the area was.

The only signs told how Ritan was where emperors in the Ming and Qing dynasties worshiped before it was turned into a park by the People's Republic of China in 1949.

There have been quickly quelled Tibet protests near the stadiums, with a number of activists detained and deported.

But little of the anger that greeted the Olympic torch on its world tour has made it to Beijing.
Some international groups did not bother to apply, assuming the Chinese regime would not allow them visas into the country or permission to demonstrate.

The red tape involved did little for hopes the protest zones would create a precedent for free speech in China.

Demonstrators had to submit their requests at least five days in advance, detail the subject of protest, and information on who would be involved.

The application also had to clarify the time, route, posters and slogans to be used, and any use of amplified sound.

The politburo set up the zones to "adhere to the Olympic traditions, such as free expression outside the sporting venues," said Mo Yuchuan, director of the Research Center for Constitutional and Administrative Law, of Renmin University of China.

He claimed: "It offers a new channel for the protesters to better express their opinions by attracting the attention of tourists, reporters and officials during the Games."

But this is not the experience of those who applied for a protest permit, according to human rights groups.

They have recorded a string of alleged abuses including that of Ge Yifei, a 48-year-old doctor who wanted to vent her anger about a property dispute in her home town of Suzhou.

She was detained for several hours before being escorted home. Zhang Wei was jailed for 30 days after applying to protest about her home being destroyed in the Olympics development.

And parents whose children died in May's Sichuan earthquake were intercepted at Chengdu airport, and had their air tickets torn up. It leaves you with little doubt that the zones were set up to appease the International Olympic Committee's concerns about freedom of speech, and were never going to be used in the first place.

Given China's failure to deliver on its human rights promises, it only strengthens the argument of those who say the decision to award the Olympics to Beijing was a big mistake - and a humiliation for the IOC.

Argentinians In 'Slant Eye' Row

An internet campaign has been set up to kick Spain out of the Olympics - just as a third photograph emerged showing athletes impersonating Chinese people.

This time it is the turn of Argentinean women footballers Maria Potassa, Eva Gonzalez, Fabiana Vallejos and Andrea Ojeda (pictured left to right) to make the offending gesture.

The new photo was published in the South American sports newspaper Ole just days before the Olympic Games kicked off, alongside a preview of the team's first match in Beijing.

It came after separate photos appeared of Spain's women's tennis players and men's basketball team pulling the skin back at their temples to make them appear 'slit-eyed'.

After the first two snaps caused international condemnation, a group on the social networking site Facebook was launched under the banner: "Kick racist Spain out of the Olympics."

One internet campaigner commented: "If this had been a British or American team then for sure we both would have been kicked out.

"It's plain and simple - Spain is a racist country and should be treated as so. An example needs to be made, especially as one billion people, or 15% of the world's population, watched the opening ceremony of the Beijing Olympics!"

The latest photo will only lengthen the debate about the attitude of the Spanish - and their closely-tied South American counterparts - towards racism in sport.

There has been anger that the International Olympic Committee refused to take action against Spain after the first two photographs appeared.

A spokeswoman for the ruling body pointed out that formal apologies had been made to the Chinese government and the matter was closed.

Argentina's women footballers were quickly dumped out of the Beijing Games, losing all three of their games.

Ironically, they lost their last match 2-0 to China.

Bushtucker Trial In Beijing

Sky News Online's Alex Watts runs his own 'Bushtucker Trial' in Beijing's Donghuamen night market.

I threw up five minutes after visiting Donghuamen night market.

It wasn't the snake, or the scorpion, the lamb's penis, testicles, bees, centipede, or the beer I downed trying to banish the taste. It was the silkworm. And if you don't believe me, watch it here...

It exploded in my mouth and it was everything I could do to stop myself instantly gagging on the musty, yellow gunk.

I managed to last until the filming stopped - and then threw up in one of the bins.

All to the bemusement of the locals, who clearly found the array of creepy crawlies, and other things that go crunch in the night, delicious.

A sign in English said the people's government had rebuilt the market, off Beijing's central Wangfujing Street, to showcase 100 "dainty snacks" from all corners of China.

They said they wanted to "enhance the friendly exchanges with foreign countries."

But when I offered the delicacies to the hordes of Olympics fans who had descended on the infamous tourist spot, I think the most complimentary comment was "absolutely disgusting".

Only the French seemed to like it. A gaggle crowded round the scorpion stand and made pleasing, lip-smacking gestures in the way they would if they were tucking into a truffle or slice of foie gras, or a frog for that matter.

The whole thing was a dreadful experience, but the politburo was right: it did lead to some friendly - and hilarious - exchanges. I even found myself having a new-found respect for the likes of Peter Andre and Paul Burrell.

The Bushtucker Trials on TV show I'm A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here looks easy when you're munching crisps on the sofa.

But when you get that first stomach convulsion, and insect legs stick in your throat, and the deep-fried, rancid taste is with you for the next 12 hours, it takes a lot more guts than you think.

"What do you think of the silkworm then?" I ask Canadian Kim Warburton, who is on a fact-finding mission for the Vancouver Games in 2010.

"It's awful. It's definitely a local taste - and it's still in my teeth!"

Her colleague Sarah Triantafillou is having none of it. I offer her a bit of snake, or was it a baby seahorse? But the most adventurous she'll go is the noodles.

"What did you think of the baby eels?" I ask. "What! No way!" she shrieks, clutching her mouth.
A Mexican guy butts in, shaking his head with a hangdog expression. "The scorpion was interesting," he muses.

I eventually get an American, in obligatory baseball cap, to eat a three-inch centipede. "It looks horrible, what does it taste like?" he grimaces. "It tastes like centipede," I tell him.

He crunches away with a pained look. "It's terrible - it's as bad as it looks. Errr centipede!" I offer him a beer to remove the taste.

"No thanks," he says. "If I drink too much beer, I might eat another one."

As the Olympics limbers up for its second week of flag-waving fervour, Sky News Online's Alex Watts looks at the lighter side of the Beijing Games.

A is for Arrests. Pro-Tibet students seem to be getting bundled into the back of police vans faster than you can say "calm a Llama down". But in the words of one seasoned hack out here in Beijing "they'll have to go some to top the Brits who shinned up those poles."

B is for Bangers. Or are they? All Olympic bosses would say were some of the fireworks "may have been" faked.

C is for Crooked Teeth. Poor Yang Peiyi might have a perfect voice but she wasn't pretty enough to sing in person at the opening ceremony - so another girl mimed it.

D is for Déjà vu. The feeling you get when someone says: "Do you know, the number eight is lucky in China - that's why the opening ceremony was held on 8/8/2008."

E is for Eight. And then they point out that it was also held at eight minutes past eight. Apart from the fireworks, that is. And the singing.

F is for Frankie 'Fun-Time' Gavin. The British boxer was definitely not having any when he got sent home for being overweight.

G is for Gold Medals. Just how many will China get this year seems to be the talk of the town. Sixteen in Atlanta, 28 in Sydney, 32 in Athens... Probably best not to delve too deeply.

H is for Hoffa. Or perhaps scoffer. World champion Reese Hoffa has an unusual celebration. The shot-putter likes to do laps of honour munching on a giant turkey leg. Why? I can't think of any other reason other than he's American.

I is for Irritating. The understated adjective used to describe the Australian past-time of ribbing Brits about sport.

J is for Johnson. Reporters can't wait until Boris gets out here. There's already talk from some about getting T-shirts printed with 'bored of the rings' on, so there's always a chance the gaffe-prone London mayor will liven things up.

K is for Kenya. He might have run for Kenya at the 1999 World Youth Games, but Stephen Cherono now runs for Qatar for a reported £500 a month for life. He even became Saaeed Shaheen.

L is for Ludicrous. While we are on the subject, Chinese table-tennis player Lin Ju is now apparently from the Dominican Republic. And Matt Reed (USA) will compete against his brother Shane (New Zealand) in the triathlon, even though they were born in the same country.

M is for clear as Mud. But it is different for horses - the rules state they must be from the same country as their rider.

N is for Nation. Michael Phelps would be fifth if he was one. His five golds put him above Australia and Great Britain in the table.O is for Oarsome. No doubt the headline if Team GB does well in the rowing.

P is for even more Predictable. Or perhaps 'Shock 'N Oar!'

Q is for Quidditch. No, it's still not an Olympic sport despite protestations from David Miliband and other Harry Potter fans.

R is for Radcliffe. Will Paula do it or won't she? And if she doesn't, will she cry?

S is for Scared. Modern pentathlete Katy Livingston admits she was terrified when she first went near a horse. That's about as interesting as some athletes get.

T is for Tiff. Tom Daley and his dive partner Blake Aldridge had one, but apparently it's all water under the bridge now.

U is for Unfortunate. there's no Eric the Eel this year.

V is for Volleyball. Tiananmen Square was originally going to be the venue for the beach volleyball. But Games chiefs thought it might be a little inappropriate.

W is for Wang Wei. The Olympics chief spokesman's name is pronounced as in 'wrong way' without the R. There were unkind titters when he took questions about the Beijing traffic system.

X is for... There isn't one because W was so good.

Y is for Yao Ming. At 7ft 6in isn't China's basketball star a bit too tall?

Z is for Zillions. Forget those myths about athletes living on beans on toast and putting a magnet on the electricity meter. The Olympics resembles a millionaires' playground these days. Ask Kobe Bryant or Roger Federer.